Which statement should be revised for a more formal tone?

Which statement should be revised for a more formal tone?

A. Poseidon, god of the sea, and Athena, goddess of war, fought for the city of Athens.

B. Poseidon threw his spear, which produced the Spring of Acropolis.

C. Amaltheia was kind of like a goat who fed Zeus, which Zeus was really happy about. In fact, he turned the goat’s horn into the horn of plenty.

D. Chronos was the ancient Greek symbol of time. His appearance, a wise old man with a long beard, is similar to a current symbol, Father Time.

E. Sisyphus displeased the gods by disclosing secrets. He found himself forced to roll a heavy stone uphill, only to see it roll back once it reached the peak.

Answer: C. Amaltheia was kind of like a goat who fed Zeus, which Zeus was really happy about. In fact, he turned the goat’s horn into the horn of plenty.

This statement in option C is written expressively and is not suitable for use in any official business. The given phrases are “kind of like” and “really happy about”; they are informal and would not be used in any legal documents or even any official writings. The following are informal elements that make the statement sound more like a post on social media than a scholarly one:

To revise this statement for a more formal tone, we could rewrite it as follows: Amaltheia, a goat-like deity fed Zeus, an action which made him happy Although happy, Zeus changed Amaltheia’s horn into the cornucopia, the ‘horn of plenty’.

This more formal and academic language retains the same data as the former version but is framed much differently. It expunges ordinary colloquialisms out of the language and puts more pointed ones in their stead. For instance, “kind of like eat” changes to “a goat-like creature,” and “really happy about” to “greatly pleased.” In addition, the term “cornucopia” which refers to the horn of plenty and has a more formal tenor, is also a part of the identifies.

Thus, the mentioned changes make the given statement more appropriate for the formal writing style that can encompass academic papers, official documents, and professional reports. The language used is very business-like and formal, which in many cases is appropriate because they are often written by professionals.